How to achieve a life balance and not go crazy when your life turns upside down?
Everybody has a different opinion on how a normal life looks like. For some of you, it is your 9 to 5 work and weekends with your kids. For others, it may be a “dance all night sleep all day” kinda’ life. But almost all of you have something in common. We have a life rhythm and a timetable that we get used to.
Following your routine tasks, you bring your life to balance. You know what to expect from the future, you know how you want to spend your vacation, you even plan how much you will spend at a restaurant on your next meeting with friends. Following your rhythm and pace gives you that calming feeling that everything is ok. Your life is in place. And you control it.
Planning and controlling everything is normal for me. Yeah… sometimes I can be impulsive. But only when you have a plan you can go away from it!
However, sometimes circumstances make you step away from your schedule even more than you would ever want it to be. A newborn, a cat in the house, moving to another place, entering a new school, refashioning your house. All of these and many other situations are stressful because they kick you out of your comfort zone, ruin your routine, and make you find your way to the new life balance.
I struggled with losing my routine for the last several months already. I had a vacation from work (which is already a timetable breaking activity), then we had to urgently leave our rented apartment, and so forth. Then I didn’t even realize how I ended up saying “I have no time for my usual tasks now” for 3 months in a row. I stopped writing, reading, studying my course, and mastered the art of finding an excuse for everything I didn’t want to do.
I started thinking how did it happen and whether I could do something about it. Generally, changes don’t ask you if you are ready for them or if you had any other plan for the next few months, or if you’ve saved that money for a vacation. They just happen. The question is how you deal with them. And how good you are at balancing your new life.
The faster you get back in track, the faster you will feel more organized, productive, and balanced. I have made a list of things that helped/could’ve helped me in getting over the crazy period of my life.
1. Keep a piece of your routine. A little something that you keep doing no matter what. A simple ritual that calms you down. It can be anything you like: a chapter of your favorite book every evening, brunch with friends, manicure every week. Whatever will help you get through the chaos you are dealing with.
2. Accept changes. Instead of fighting with them, accept them! Take a deep breath and let them into your life. Plan how you will come back to your life with new circumstances. Only if you want to have your “old” life back again.
3. Consider taking some calming medicine or herbal teas if the mess is too disturbing. It can be really helpful.
4. Make a list. I love lists. They help you to stick to your timetable and reminds you what you would normally do.
5. Treat yourself. One day I found myself sinking in a movement-packing-construction circle. I forgot about myself. And how much relieved I felt after going to a hairstylist and having my manicure done.
6. Remember that everything is temporary (even what you think is constant also temporary, that’s a sad finding). Make a correct mood to find powers to deal with all the struggles that fall on you.
7. Don’t stress out your loved ones, accept their help instead. Most of you are lucky to have loving families and friends who are happy to help. Don’t reject it thinking that it’s not their problem. If people are willing to help you, help them with accepting it and be grateful.
The only constant thing in the world is “changes”.
As one smart psychologist say, you should not build a stable life for yourself, you should build a stable personality so that not even a chaos can shake your life balance.
No matter how big are the changes you are dealing with, don’t lose yourself!